CB Radio 101

Hello earthly beings, human and otherwise. After the lukewarm response to my earlier note called “Musing of Webmaster Motu” (i should have called it The Ramblings instead) i decided to abide by the age old saying, ” Try and Try until the Coffee runs out.”.

The title of this particular entry is CB Radio 101. So what is this CB radio, one would ask. Is it a new FM station in town? Is it a 101 about Radio in general? Well again for all those ignorant enough to ignore my status updates and comments CB radio stands for “Collective Bullshit Radio” . The note is a 101 about what constitutes Collective  Bullshit (henceforth referred to as CB) and what is the definition of CB.




Collective Bullshit : The Act of talking, doing or reproducing bull shit in any form by two or more people.



A few summers ago some of my friends  introduced me to the concept of CB. The aforementioned friends being Sameer Desai, Dr. Adwait Desai, Abhijeet Bhandurge, Ashwin Kumar, Amit Shirodkar and Sudarshan Vernal. What started out as  a small discussion led to the coining of the term Collective bullshit. So effectively CB was born out of CB.



The very idea of Collective Bullshit is that “Golden Words Are Not Repeated” or to put it colloquially “Akashwani Sirf Ek hi baar Hoti Hai”. Two or more people start discussing nothing to with anything and come up with some seriously funny stuff which you will not remember the next day. Although there may be certain CB events that may get etched in memory and become the talking point of many a conversations in your future meetings. CB becomes the glue that holds you together. (Come to think of it there is an element of shit involved so that does sound gross.)



A few examples of CB in the real world

  1. All the meetings for the CWG New Delhi.
  2. Indian Politics
  3. The entire Dubya Bush era of US poiltics.
  4. Indo-Pak  meetings over terrorism.
  5. Andaz Apna Apna –  The Movie
  6. Engineering under VTU.
  7. How I Met your Mother
  8. Friends

And lots of other examples that would come to my mind but then i wouldn’t want to bore you. (The last two in the list actually made a lot of money just by telecasting CB)


Now, over the years my friends and I have dissipated and disseminated a lot of CB all over the country and we have found out one thing and one thing only; No one can refuse the opportunity to do a little CB once in a while. It works as a great stress buster and is very good for the overall well being of the human and otherwise body. We have also found that CB is contagious like the Avian Flu. Once you start the cycle continues; may be in a different setting and language but still managing to bring people together and hold them together. ( And I thought all you needed was love)


This article was to enlighten everyone to the very special entity called CB. In conclusion all I would like to add is that Bullshit on its own is a bad thing but when clubbed together with a few friends ( and a few drinks if you like) it can become something as magical as CB.


I wish all the future CB’ers all the very best. May the BullShit of the collective variety be with you.


CB RADIO 101 signing off.





PS: This right here is the very prime example of CB.


In all my time as a student of computer science i was always intrigued by the examples that authors used in their books on programming.Whenever they explained any program with functions they assumed two functions foo() and bar().

for ex: consider the following  code :


int a=5, c;

int b=6;


return c;




int d=8, e;




To all the programmer buddies out there please bear with my dumb example. It is just a means to an end. What i would like to bring to your notice is however the two function names themselves; foo() and bar(). Put them together; foobar and they sound similar to… Voila! FUBAR!!!!

I was completely taken aback the first time is saw these words on an international book nonetheless. The authors had a great sense of humor and what better way have a laugh than to incorporate something like this in a book on programming!!

To the uninformed and those who haven’t kept up with my status updates , FUBAR is military terminology for :

F***ed Up Beyond Any Recognition. used mostly in situations where no kind of crying or begging will lead to a  Ctrl+Z.

For ex : The software is ready for deployment and you decide to clean up the system today because u like everything in order. Ony you decide to trry out the new software which promises DoD level defrag and cleaning of the hard disk and you say yes to the little box with the red exclamation sign which says “This procedure is irreversible!”, only to realise that u accidentally selected the folder that has the entire code and the backup ( Go with me on this one guys! i know you don’t keep you backups together with the code..:D). So your situation can be  described in one word : you are FUBAR’ed!!

ex no. 2: Your best friend is getting married and you have the ring. ( your best friend is catholic..:P). well you decide to go to the bathroom and lean over the commode to flush, and you hear a clink.!! bang you just dropped the ring into the commode and flushed it…FUBAR’ed!!!


So now that you have an idea of how FUBAR can be used next time you start reading up on basic programming, just look out for the elusive foo and bar..:D



Webmaster Motu!


PS : you might wanna read up on these